Thursday, May 31, 2007

interview mega-challenge

via hell's half acre i will compete, today, the 31st of may, in the interview challenge. if you would like to join me in this quest i will post the rules and regulations at the end of this thought-provoking quest into my inner mind that miss krixie has posed below. i am strapping on my kneecaps and shinpads. I am ready to do this thing, as they say.

1.) Where has your butler disappeared to and how are you dealing with not having someone to bring you your cafe?

My butler has been going through some tough times with the crack and the hos and hase thus spent much of his time in the basement of the rat army headquarters down the street. However, every morning he is ever so faithful in bringing me the cafe brewed with the sweet, morning dew that he collects off the tender, young branches of saplings and stamens. Do not doubt it. Can you not feel his presence every time you open the pages of this blog? Open the pores on your typing hands and let him in. Feel.

2.) How did you come up with the name Phantastic? Do you like the words Phat, Phunky, or Phresh?

Phantastic was the name of the first unicorn I dug out of an acorn shell. Yes, I enjoy the language of the people, the language of jeans, the "f" sound. I like to image the ph's as my offering of love to my readers.

3.) We all choose how much to reveal about ourselves on our blogs through our different blog personas. What percentage of your blog persona do you feel represents you?

I do enjoy the fried chicken nuggets, the lavender sweats and hanging bellies, the cumberbunds, the joyful music of a marching band. This blog is more me than my rational beige persona in many ways.

4.) Describe the effect, if any, of blogging/blogs on your relic making.

not so much on the actual doings. the relic-blog world is completely great for chatting and potion-recipes, learnings and feeding of the mind's eye. here we can also expose the bad wizards, report on chelsea forest. the ether fortifies.

5.) Suppose you could span time and distance. Which band would you be a groupie for and why?

i can imagine myself as a mystical-being/potion-brewer for the beatles circa 1965-67. i would like to ride in john lennon's white rolls royce and hang out with the rolling stones in london. we would wear capes and velvet. i would grow a mustache and would be known as the fairy-beatle.


IF YOU are up for the competition, the challenge of answering the questions I will choose follow these instructions. If you are not then I will accept my victory.


1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions, so make sure I have your email address. I get to pick the questions.

3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

65 comments:

krixfort said...

FB! you have most definitely risen to the challenge!

Fairy-Beatle, I will join you in the velvet cape wearing. That sounds divine.

pd said...

May I have the potion? Now? Please?

fairy butler said...

peeds, are you just after the mind juice for dulling at the beige? OR are you responding to my challenge? do you want the questions or do you accept my victory?

pd said...

VICTORY is yours. My mind needs the juice.
Our AC is not working so well here and I am getting very sleepy.
We have some Korean co-agents coming here ans I am hoping they bring us chocolate, as they do every year.

fairy butler said...

i am in a rage here at beige - not due to beige but to these tarded art wizards. i was supposed to send relics to basel and went to all this trouble with a shipping company and what not and now they are canceling the whole thing. hate. seriously.

fairy butler said...

really messed up. unless the swallow, ie pay for the mix up I am not going to be working with them. another one down. cahrist. why? why? why does this crap always happen? fuck it. seriously.

krixfort said...

yargh, fb, the tard wizards seem to be coming out of their respective caves lately. What gives?

fairy butler said...

i don't need it.

fairy butler said...

i guess artists are just so desperate or something that they will put up with craziness?

fairy butler said...

i can't tell how much of this breakdown has been my fault or theirs. god this sucks.

fairy butler said...

and now i am worried that it already shipped out. that would be really messed up. i doubt it did since there is customs paperwork that would need to go with it. the wizards are being nice about it but the incompetence/miscommunication so far has me unsure of whether i would want to go forward with them. sad.

martin said...

what? that is nuts... they cancelled on taking your stuff, or they cancelled their participation completely?

that really blows. i would feel so sick. they should get a rock through the window.

sorry, fb. i reallly love that last painting you posted, the galactic stallion.

fairy butler said...

hi martin. thanks for the kind words. my stomach is sick with worry. it is apparently too expensive for them to ship and then pay customs through switzerland and then germany. or something. f'd up. they are saying now we'll do the hamptons fair but i am not sure. if we went to judge wapner with the email string i think i would win. fuck. and i'm kinda sad cause i was curious how my relics would do in europe. oh well. whatever, chalk up another mark against normalcy in relic biz.

hammy said...

FB, this is wrong! very very! If you don't get repaid I will have a hernia.

fairy butler said...

i heard from the shipper and he is being totally cool. if i pick up from him directly it will cost me nothing but if they deliver back to me something - but probably not much. all is fine. my stomach is unclenching now.

martin said...

jeez fb, you need to turn the tv on more often... judge wapner is history. it is all about the judge judy.

they must have lost all of their money on the booth, right? it's a little late for refunds. sounds fishy...

fairy butler said...

sorry, i am all out of date on my judge shows clearly. i only watch star trek next generation and comedy central. You know that, right?

Only good news is that I am in a group show later in june and i just got the roster of artists in it. kind of killer! excited. so all is not from the devil today.

fairy butler said...

why do i have such horrible luck with relic stuff and galleries? am i cursed or something? i am starting to think i should just open an online store.

krixfort said...

I will hang your relics in my virtual gallery, FB.

fairy butler said...

the whole scandal is only going to cost me 40$ in the end. so no biggie. but how many new gray hairs have sprouted? this is the true issue, right?

arthoooor said...

This should help:


To maintain your natural looking color and salon quality gray coverage, reapply Nice ‘n Easy Gray Solution every 4 to 6 weeks.

My beigelife, in a buttshell.

fairy butler said...

i feel like doodoo - the scandal wiped me out. arthur i may dip into the hair dye stash later on. it is safe and approved to take internally?

krixfort said...

someone caught me napping in my cube. . .BUSTED.

scandals are tiring fb. it's time to grab the space bag.

fairy butler said...

krix - another day of nothing here. i was at a meeting for 15 minutes and sent two emails. that is seriously all i have done. working on my story but concentration is weak.

i am ready for something to happen like me leaving here.

fairy butler said...

i desire two martinis in quick succession but i will resist. i will go to the relics place and stare and wonder wtf i was doing 2 weeks ago.

fairy butler said...

will leave in another 15 minutes i am thinking. this is stupid.

fairy butler said...

got another email from the wizard of far away offering an alternative explanation to all the chaos. they are trying to make nice i guess? i think i just need to let it be for awhile. yesterday wore me out.

krixfort said...

Hello FB. I am supposed to tell you that you rock, which I'm sure you already know. Someone was looking at your solo blart show and they think you are great.

R.S. said...

FB, who is this majik wizard in a far off land? Is he bringing your many treasures to one of the forthcoming wizard-conventions?

fairy butler said...

rs,

indeed it is a far off wizard who seems genuinely good but perhaps a bit disorganized. I may be participating in a convention forthcoming - but until it actually happens for real i am not counting on it. given what just happened. i have bad luck or something, not sure.

fairy butler said...

i will reveal this wizard to you when next i see thee if you ask. on blog is no goody.

R.S. said...

understood. full disclosure not needed. this is great! The gods of yore will indeed smile upon you fb (that is, if you remember to sacrifice at least 1 char-broiled weiner to said gods this summer... otherwise be ready to incur their forceful wrath.)

toodles said...

Am I allowed to mention an artist that I helped make a couple of photographs (i.e. his idea, I made the photograph, he printed it) has sold c-prints (just a color print mind you) at auction for $150k? One of the images I made for/with him is at Saatchi comming up. They are expecting 60-80 for it. Why didn't I demand free art/buy a bunch 10 years ago? Why?

Gaylord said...

Hi FB! Hello!
It is I, Queen of Gaylordness, visiting for a shot of FB magick. THANK YOU for your support of chicken nuggets. i like them too. i also really like the chubby Velazquez pony- i always call my dog Mister Chubby Velazquez, cuz he looks like the pony pictured below. Have you been stone cold chillin' to any Zep lately?
xo,
Gay

fairy butler said...

hi gaylord! so long no see.... we really really really need to visit the tomb of song again, right? and bring the nuggets, ponies, etc.

krixfort said...

yes please. I would give my left . . .something or other, to hear the melodious sounds which eminate from Gaylord.

Dubz too. Well everyone. I am not singling anyone out.

When is the next song fest?

Gaylord said...

Hey Krix! Girl, you can belt out some soul/disco classics yerself. i would love to k-oke, but am leaving town until aug next week. i did go to this great place in red hook that is free...and it's on thurs and fri nights...maybe tomorrow? FB? i could call someone and get the name and directions.

krixfort said...

ohhh sweet baby jebus. a friday night could be a hit.

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