Sunday, April 30, 2006

the pile removers

Did you know that you can go on craigslist and hire pile removers? Unfortunately they are not vigilante pile removers roaming the streets of bushwick - you have to pay them - but they came and gotur done. The decapitated Mayan temple, keeper of the mummies, mushrooms, corpses, potential critterdens, etc., was taken away. The evil spirits, which have plagued my backyard since the day I moved in over 2 years ago, have been pacified and released. Now there is peace, a clean slate, a place for me to plant 50 different flowering perennials. YES. Also Arthur and I stained/sealed our fence. It is almost done. We decided to colorize it and not go with au natural. why? well, the fence, upon inspection, is not the greatest of quality. rustic is the word i told arthur to think of. like an ocean going vessel, old docks, a wheelbarrow. So we feared it would crumble faster than expected if left alone. I am liking the darker color i think. too late anyway.

32 comments:

fairy butler said...

Can you spot the fb butt crack?

deli-slicer said...

Crack-tastic, FB! I can't even remember the piles in your backyard (real backyard). All I remember is beautiful flowers and tasty meats.

It looks so great and ready for a bbq (hint, hint).

deli-slicer said...

My neigbor is blasting "Beat It" at ungodly levels here. My floor is vibrating.

fairy butler said...

oh pd, that is not allowed. blasting music on sunday morning. especially beat it. i am sure that later today it will be a storm of motorized scooters and screaming religious sermons in spanish. the pep boys are also sure to have the auto clinic in full swing later. sweet exhaust.

Yes, we shall certainly host BBQ upon BBQ. I had hotdogs yesterday for lunch and friday for dinner. for real.

fairy butler said...

my head is pressurized today. cannot shake the dengue fever/karokoff's syndrome/lung cancer. it's driving me crazy. consumption.

deli-slicer said...

I am feeling less pressurized today.
You may need another hot dog to even things out. I haven't had one since I snagged one from the hot dog tower.

krixfort said...

mmmmm. hot dogs. I had two yesterday, one pre-baseball and one during baseball. Both: delicious.

sloth said...

FB! your backyard looks exciting. you can read whatever you want into that statement.

krixfort said...

yes FB, can't wait to visit your back yard. I think you know what I mean by that.

burrito brother said...

this is great news, fb. I've been schlepping my own piles for too long now... oh shizzle, gotta go work...

fairy butler said...

update. dog raping is down to 2 dogs. will there be rapes? this is to come.

i am back tonight from 2nd day at the shack. having celebratory cocktail in honor of the most ever ridiculous painting i have ever made. not done, but dumb dumb dumb just how i like them. (this is not self-deprecation.)

update #2. crazy drug addict down the street is better i think. has gained probably 20 lbs, gotta be a good sign? does not seem crazy or pinpointed in the eyes. is cordial and not rooting through garbage. no scabs on face. also, i have not seen the drug dealers out in like 2 weeks. ?????

fairy butler said...

i think that they collectively know that the fb's mom is on her way from iowa this week for a visit. they are being polite. not fouling.

pd, i was just reading ABCN and your comment on the 3 way with pete, kate, and robert downey jr. is still making me chuckle.

fairy butler said...

i am drinking the duty-free liquors that arthur bought. i was annoyed that he wanted to purchase these items, alcohol and cigs, but now I reap the reward.

gosh, i'm just typing away all to myself here. how are you? i am fine. i am vaguely hyper at midnight. oh that is not good you have the beige. i hate the beige.

ok . i am done.

peeds said...

FB! Morning. I wish I was awake and sipping cocktails with you in the ether last night. But alas, I was in bed by 11.

I am planning to get drunk today at the beige. It is the only way. My boss' wife is here and she drives everyone batty.

fairy butler said...

for the second day in a row i leave the home before 9 and get to work at 10. thank you L train. thank you.

krixfort said...

PD, I saw your friends, The Nervous Cabaret kids, last night. The only problem is that they didn't go on until midnight (supposed to start at 11.) It was too late for me to stay for their entire set. What I heard was pretty coolio.

Hi FB! What's shakin'?

pd said...

Hey Krixy. Yeah, they are good. Very strange at times. I haven't seen them perform in a while. They used to practice in my old shack building.

AlsoArthur said...

yeah L train chomped on multiple penis today. So badly in fact, that I couldn't takle it anymore and got out early to take the n/r uptown instead of the c/e.

But the only good thing about a neverending ride: I listened to the entire Sleater/Kinney record 'the woods'. Haven't given that a spin in a while. Wow. I forgot how awesome it is.

AlsoArthur said...

Oh, and while listening to Sleater/Kinney I decided that my stodgy old teevee channle needs to do a weekly show called 'Indi-pendent Women'. Cool rock chicks, hot lix, live shows and interviews, lala.

I've been pitching that half heartedly for years. Perhaps I should try again.

fairy butler said...

yes arthur. pitch again!! maybe get venus zine involved?

burrito brother said...

PITCH THOSE BITCHEZ AA!
The world is ready...

toodster said...

Nice, and Nice. I love the color, I love the crack, I love the green, I love the love. The color is great and will fade over time anyway. You may want to consider hitting the other side of the fence too with something waterproof to to extend the age..but the fence is great and will be great for a long time. Invite us uver so I can frolick topless through the heather.

fairy butler said...

toods, you have to PROMISE on the topless part before you can come over. i will show the crack.

krixfort said...

FB, I am in love with your yard. It is like a little friendly oasis.

fairy butler said...

thank thee krix. I am a total old lady who just wants to putter around pruning plants. I am trying to make a safe oasis after the scrabble from the train to home in the summer. The peeps emerge - part fine and alive, part depressing.

mom is going to help with the plantings this weekend. the yard will improve.

burrito brother said...

Hey fb,

Maybe this is the ego talking (or the id), but I really think we're due for a karaoke party. Either in house or big-city style.
What doth thou say?

pd said...

FB, that sounds like fun. I used to help my dad with his garden and I really enjoyed that. Now, I can't even keep a cactus goin' in my apartment.

fairy butler said...

BB, I am always always down with a karaoke party. you must know this about me. Anything to take me away from the pathetic reality of reality.

sloth said...

yay Mom!

toodles said...

I don't know what this means really, but it is how I feel today:

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/
04/30/magazine/30funny_humor.html

fairy butler said...

oh my god toodles. that was hilarious. giggling at desk. it's funny becuase I recently this writer's collection of essays - sex, drugs, and cocoa puffs - and by the end of it i wanted to paper cut his face 1 million times with old copies of spin magazine. annoying. but, this essay is totally funny.

AlsoArthur said...

FB you are boring me! get with the new post ramblings, chop chop!

you have no excuse, especially after drinking for lunch!