Wednesday, January 11, 2006

YA YA and the Traveling Pants

I've got nothing this morn.

Well, actually, last night I went to the ole contortion heavy breathing chamber sweat box (yoga class). I got there late so got the great spot in front of the heater. ugh. But i somehow ended up next to this guy - a teacher at this place i frequent. So - whatevs i think. Well before class this guy is doing handstands all fancy and crap in the middle of the room. i ignore. Then during practice we have like 10 minutes to do our own thing (sun salutation stuff at the beginning) and he (out of the corner of my eye) is doing some crazy break dancing trapeze artist show off hand stand every second mania. What is the deal with this? It was crazy. I felt conflicted judging the show-off-ness of this behavior in yoga class, and I dunno, maybe i shouldn't care what he does. But it was seriously balls out - not literally - but very extreme, in my opinion. he left early so i forgot about him. but please.

Mini movie review:
Grizzly = movie is worth watching. what a fucking idiot.

94 comments:

Anonymous said...

i'm constantly comparing myself to other excercisers at the gym. it's mostly why i avoid the gym. but sunday i'm giving yoyogaga the old college try once again! wish me luck.

fairy butler said...

right on bb about the yoga.

i can say that even if i could do those crazy moves that the dude next to me was strutting i hope i wouldn't string them all together in a frenzy in the middle of class. i was like - take it easy guy. settle down. i must avoid being near him in the future.

sloth said...

FB, it is SO annoying when people show off like that... at the Chelsea Pain Arena it happens all the time.

Is your yogurt class the sauna kind, where they heat up the room to 105 degrees?

sloth said...

Also cannot stand people in the stretching room who make crazy breathing noises. Thank god for iPod.

fairy butler said...

my yogurt class is regular - not heated. i am afraid of that heat thing- it's too much for the FB. but last night it was extra hot for some reason. i don't mind that usually but i got all faint at one point. at least i did not smell of liquor for once though.

the whole notion of show-off yoga is so funny to me. i think this guy next to me is just young and eager - he must not know any better.

sloth said...

Help, FB... it is DEAD at beige today. Just thumb-twiddling. Maybe I'll go try some breakdance moves in the boss' office.

Anonymous said...

I didn't see "Grizzly Man" but I'm going to take a wild guess and assume that my reaction to it will be something like, "That's neat that he hung out with bears but he deserved to get eaten." Why didn't he just hang out in active minefields?

I wonder if, during his final mauling, he was alive long enough to realize the extent to which he had fucked up. Did the movie go into any kind of graphic detail about what parts of his body went unconsumed? I'm sort of hoping he had all of his limbs ripped from his body and got to experience life as a bleeding torso over three days.

Did the bears get his nose?

sloth said...

I heard an interview w/ Herzog about the bear movie. I guess he saw the video where they get eaten, but didn't put it in the movie... too "snuffy." Maybe they could put it on the DVD as an extra feature... "kids, don't try this at home."

sloth said...

We saw King Kong... it was wincingly racist.

fairy butler said...

They identify the guy's remains by emptying the stomach contents of the bear. his remains and his girlfriend's. initially the pilot coming to pick them up see a bear feasting on a bloody human rib cage. there were clothes inside the bear also.

this guy was pretty wacko. i wanted to know more about his past - they go into it a little, but i wanted more pre-grizzly stuff.

basically- it was long drawn-out and creative suicide for this guy. i guess he thought alcohol & heroin were too boring.

fairy butler said...

the bears, foxes, and landscape of the movie are beautiful. it's worth renting/netflixing for that.

Anonymous said...

"King Kong" should have had more bloody human rib cages in it. I didn't see that either, but I can tell there were no bloody human rib cages in it because it didn't get any Golden Globe nominations. "Brokedick Mountain," on the other hand, is like a cross between "Dawn of the Dead" and "Dunston Checks In." This is why it got so many of the fuckers.

sloth said...

Thanks FB, "Grizzly Man" was just moved to the top of my list, followed by "My Favorite Fiend," which I always meant to see.

fairy butler said...

what's the deal with brokeback mountain? do we get to see some man ass in it or what?

fairy butler said...

oh, sloth, 'my fav fiend' and 'grizzly' would be a really good (albeit a bit boring) double header. i was thinking about my fav fiend as i watched the bears last night.

Anonymous said...

The totality of "Bareback Mountain" is nothing but Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhall fisting each other for two hours. At the 90-minute mark, Heath Ledger, who has JG inside of him all the way up to the elbow, turns to him and says "I wish I knew how to quit you." Then the fisting resumes for another 30 minutes.

There wasn't a dry eye in the house.

fairy butler said...

trying to discern the messed up inner psyches of damaged men. kind of compelling. is it a faulty gene? lack of meds?

sloth said...

Back when I was painting still-lives of dildos etc., I noticed a variety of rubber fists/forearms for sale at the sex shop. Seemed like they would be difficult to use; no suction cups for wall mounting or anything. So maybe they're for, like, for when your partner is a double amputee or something?

fairy butler said...

thanks daiel. i am moving it to the top of my queue. i heard the soundtrack was great also.

Anonymous said...

There's no music in it. The soundtrack is just two hours of squishy noises.

sloth said...
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sloth said...
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Anonymous said...

Whoa! I was intrigued by Grizzly Man because he was so unsympathetic! By the end of the movie I was like--all this because you didn't get the role of Woody on Cheers??

sloth said...

Thus he was driven to become a human toothpick...

Anonymous said...

Ah, yeah, the toothpick was invented by the cherokee indians in the late...

Anonymous said...

He was just a bored kid from Long Island...and probably a closeted homosexual.

Anonymous said...

Now I want to see Brokeback Grizzly Mountain...where Jake and Heath have a foursome with Grizzly Man and his favorite bear.

sloth said...

Fox perserve idea rocks!

One year when opening up the dune shack for the summer, we found a family of red foxes living under the house: momma & 3 pups. The pups had little black sox. speaking of cuteness overload.

fairy butler said...

arthur, the movie review guy is different person from daiel. but his review of brokeback mtn. does remind one of those classics like 'passion of the crist tard' etc. from long ago. i will have to dig up that link again.

Anonymous said...

I have never ever, ever never been in a gym ever. But I can do the worm.


I do a Godzilla impression too if you have some weed.

Anonymous said...

daiel,

I don't know who you are or what the fuck you think you are doing,

but I wuv woo.

thnx for making me choke on my turkey/bacon wrap (yes it was slathered in mayo)

Anonymous said...

yes FB, daiel is a special treat. He should be packaged and distributed to beiges across the country.

Anonymous said...

Awwwww... you people are too nice.

It's too bad that it will all end as soon you find out that I am a Jew.

Here is a link to my friend's movie reviews:

http://www.cca.org/woc/movies/

If you go to the main page (http://www.cca.org/), there's a picture of him there. And yes ladies, he's single!

Anonymous said...

HERE's his picture:

http://www.cca.org/dave/index.html

fairy butler said...

oh dear.

fairy butler said...

arthur. it's your favorite - white guy with dreds.

Anonymous said...

http://www.sca.org/


Ductape+cardboard=time-machine

Anonymous said...

So, I guess the wiccan wedding thing went south.

:(

sloth said...

nice bathroom dreds... they must help to pull in the signals from space. Have I told you about the hat-hair lady? Her hair = one big, lopsided, misshapen dred.

Anonymous said...

hey sloth, you should see the white guy with dreds in his natural habitat while you're in Boulder. That's where they hail from although the species has managed to spread to other regions. There are many outposts where they seem to thrive. . .Eugene, OR. Arcada, CA. Santa Cruz. I don't know too much about their eastern territories though.

Anonymous said...

The Wiccan wedding thing went south but I don't blame Wiccanism so much as the guy's fondness for heroin at the time. I think he got that monkey off his back a few years ago, but my understanding is that it's the sort of thing that many people would call a "deal-breaker."

By the way, all Wiccans are stupid. I'm just sayin'>

fairy butler said...

yes daiel. heroin habit would be a deal-breaker. and wiccans = stupid. krix, your comments about boulder made me giggle out loud in my pen. what is going on with that place. do they not sell combs there? or conditioner?

Anonymous said...

they don't seem to sell soap there either. here's what you can find there:

drums --- for drum circle drumming in Chattaqua Park.

Patchouli oil -- When things are getting a little too ripe, it's always good to try to mask it with something that smells like moldy ass.

sloth, do not bring back samples of Patchouli oil.

Anonymous said...

ugg I am so frootin' bored today I have taken to sticking my face into the reflective shampoo bottle shots doning groucho marx glasses/nose to scare my retoucher guy.

Anonymous said...

krix, don't forget the 2 - 50 year old guys on acoustic guitars down on the ped mall doing pink floyd's "wish you were here" on repeat.


and wool socks w/ tevas

and people jogging at 4 am

Anonymous said...

I feel so behind. What are you speaking of? Why are you exercising and listening to music?

fairy butler said...

i have realized that today in the beige lunchroom i was speaking very loudly talking about the grizzly guy timmy. i said "god, he was such a fag!" time and again. The pc police may be after me soon. i forget.

fairy butler said...

am i really at work? or am i in a time loop? or at an internet cafe?

fairy butler said...

arthur - - is that what I said? i can't remember. same sentiment though.

Anonymous said...

thanks for the Floyd reference tude. HA! Now it's stuck in my head. I guess I will have to go kill a hippie now.

Anonymous said...

What is tude? What is fag?

Anonymous said...

It's time to put you in cuffs. You're fag-calling days have just ended. Off to the pokey with you.

Anonymous said...

Kool Aid, Sharkleberry Fin flavor, it's blue, like my balls.
Macaroni and Cheese casserole
Tuna (flaky style) casserole
Hot Dogs with the cheese embedded within
Rolos

Anonymous said...

that you all for protecting me.

wrap it up, B!

fairy butler said...

oh, excuse me arthur. jeese. quote-hoarder

Anonymous said...

me no spell checky. So hard to do in my encasement.

sloth said...

here is my attempt to depict the hat-hair lady. Not my best work, but you get the drift. The hair is FUSED.

Anonymous said...

that is a crazy birdsnest sloth. I am not understanding how one could live with that. Itchy.

sloth said...

It's sort of like a bird's nest made by one of those species that uses mud as a component in their nest-building.

Anonymous said...

I am looking for hair. Do you think that lady will share?

Anonymous said...

I don't know anything anymore. Can someone help? I need more hair.

sloth said...

It's funny, because sighting her around the city has become sort of like seeing a rare bird. We report spotting her to each other, where we saw her, etc.

Anonymous said...

Hair is what the people want.

Anonymous said...

She sounds fun to see. Hi. I am nude.

sloth said...

Oh, I hope so, AA... and MM...

Anonymous said...

FB & AA, I just sent you an email. I need advice. Please help me for I am dumb.

Anonymous said...

" It's time to put you in cuffs. You're fag-calling days have just ended. Off to the pokey with you."

I've always wondered if anyone's ever been called a "fag" while ass-raping someone in prison.

FB, who has white-person dreads here? I need to know so that I may better hate on them.

Anonymous said...

If you go to jail and ever ass-rape someone, I promise to come visit and call you a fag.

Did I get that right?

fairy butler said...

no one has the white person dreds. it's that woman who works in LLC with the crazy hair nest - name starts with a m i think?? I don't know her but her locks scare me. sorry.

Anonymous said...

Prisons are catching on to chicken-finger rapes now.

Anonymous said...

in the ass of course.

Anonymous said...

I am into rape via fried objects. Call me something nasty!!! Go on.

Anonymous said...

I likes the fried mozzarella sticks.

Anonymous said...

how long does the thread get b4 we are all fired..wait I'm self- employed beatchez! sorry.

on a broke'd back mount/prison tip:
was watching the trailer comercial the other night and I saiz to the wifey "man I am suprised there isn't more red-state backlash over that flick..you know gay cowboys and all"

she saiz"they aren't gay..its like prison, you know, not gay; lonely"

I think she was serious. She needs a nap.

Anonymous said...

...in the ass of course.

fairy butler said...

....right....right....

Anonymous said...

They ain't gay in brokeback, they was just a little cold and needed to warms themselves.

Anonymous said...

Anyone who goes to that movie and smiles at any point during its two-hour duration is a pedophile.

Anonymous said...

Pedophilia rocks the house. It feels so good to touch and view smooth young skin. Esp. when my skin is so cratery, hairy and rough.

Anonymous said...

Indeed. I'm not one myself, but I believe in my heart of hearts that pedophiles are both more eveolved specimens of humanity, and that they are closer to God.

Anyone who disagrees with this sits upon a throne of lies.

Anonymous said...

There's nothing wrong with loving children and their hairless scrota and their pink little dicks. I just wish that society wasn't so uncool and heavy towards Allen Ginsburg types who just want to deflower eight-year-olds and put them in NAMBLA calendars.

Anonymous said...

Don't forget those nice closed-eye like girl pusses. No hair in sight. Glory of gloryholes.

fairy butler said...

ok. now you are all freaking me out.

Anonymous said...

spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spum spam spam spam


One closer to a hundee!

Anonymous said...

All you pedophiles think you are so cool and unique, but you don't have shit..err I mean scat. You are like the asshat on the corner of St. marks and 1st ave asking for change with the Exploited jacket and the green mohawk, thinking "yeah man I am unique, look at me I'm one of a kind man". But that's just a load of scat...look there is another joker clone sitting 10 ft. to your left. You are just a predictable attention whore. Yeah you heard me. You are so busy trying to be unique you don't realize that you may as well be dressed in head-to-toe old Navy, cause brother you are a tool. Mb if you had some real balls you would be into puppet porn or
http://www.loonerz.com/balloons.html
But no, you just go a sniffin' around the Montesorri school for a little hairless-fix. You want to toussle for realz? Lets meet behind the food court at the mall and I'll teach you a thing or 2 about poppers and non-poppers.

Anonymous said...

yeah, it's 11:50 pm and I'm drinking whiskey.


so fucking what.

Anonymous said...

mb I have a problem

Anonymous said...

and mb you have a problem too if you know what "mb" means.

Anonymous said...

slop-floppin' the BENGAMIN bishes.

Mountain Man said...

Wow Tood. You feeling ok this morning??? Hope so. You are right about pedophiles, they are all too common. I think it would be much cooler if they would spend their time f-ing muppets. Excellent points.

fairy butler said...

oddly i watched a law& order about a woman pedophile last night. IT was dumb. but I was like - can i have a few hours without kid raping? is that so much to ask?

Anonymous said...

meh. I was trying to be funny (read:sarcastic) and push this fatty over a hundred.

::shrugs::

I do like the looner site though.

fairy butler said...

s'all good toodster!

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