Thursday, July 07, 2005

i will run you down

My butler, arthur and I have noticed something that is getting out of hand. people walking in traffic irregardless of streetlights, traffic patterns, obstructed views and such. this is especially prevalent on Bushwick Avenue across from the projects. Blatant disregard for moving vehicles. I dare you to run me down. I honk, I yell, I give people ominous hand gestures. It doesn't stop them. Sometimes they have kids in tow. My most favorite is the 20centers who walk extra slow in traffic to prove how bad ass they really are. They are so impressive I want to get freaky with them and buy them a diamond stud earring and maybe produce their first record.

I noticed a ho yesterday on my way to work, subtly dressed, but the spastic swooshing walk gave it away. She ambled up to a minivan and talked with a potential customer... I guess. It was before 9 am. This is not right. Does a man really need a blow job at 9 in the morning? Isn't that a little early?

3 comments:

sloth said...

FB! The ped-suicidal-tendency phenomenon is fascinating. It is also a real factor in Manhattan, on the crosstown streets. Someday a real rain will come...

Anonymous said...

the ghetto stare down is common in JC too, FB. My personal favorite however, is the woman who uses her child's stroller (with child strapped in, of course) as a blocker, pushing stroller baby out into the line of fire as she tries to stop traffic.

Suicidal peds = Darwin's little helpers.

Anonymous said...

Best regards from NY! »