Monday, June 06, 2005

third attempt

blogger is fouling at the beige world today. there is internet disruption and such. I have found my way to the new corporate herding place. My pen is plasticky smelling and beige with many empty drawers. My skin will soon acquire this plasticine texture and color - robot dronish, smooth, and obedient. There are metal badges to get through the special sliding doors. I stare at a corner with no visual stimulation - just the corner where beige meets blue squares. I feel even more diminished and lacking. The snorter, the Russian, the "have a good one", all are dispersed. I can no longer watch the movements of the joyless eater or encounter the oatmeal maker. I miss them. Now I just stare at the corner. Diminished and headachey. I can hear my friends on the other side of the wall. Sometimes I pop up using the gopher maneuver to say hello. But I am so lacking in stimulation that I may be perceived as desperate. I can't let on that I am really not a drone. I must adapt to this new jail.

The stadium pit, on the other hand, is really something else. It is indeed a Pit. There are wooden folding stadium bleacher seats. I hear talk of an area of the pit called "the garden" where one can enjoy a contemplative cup of coffee. Doesn't that sound nice in the morning? This is how the employee "welcome guide" refers to one of the many uses for the pit.

I ate half a pack of skittles at 10am today. This is the third attempt I am making at posting this dum dum post. curses to the new beige. why beige?? always beige?

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

Everyone is moving! So are you saying you want the oatmeal lady back? Geez Fairy, that sounds bad. Maybe you should call a drone meeting and interview a potential new whole-grainer.

fairy butler said...

yes, i know. I don't really want them back, but you know how sometimes negative attention is better than none at all? it's just very bleak and isolation like here. I am literally staring at a corner.

fairy butler said...

i need weapons.

Anonymous said...

Fairy I am working on weaponry for our new cubes as I type this. I have to work on weaponry because nothing else can be accomplished here at this time.

My favorite is a laser stun gun that will shoot an invisible laser dagger through beige cube walls. I will be able to zap the rogue, the hooker, and the FNG (he is now renamed the auditory offender.)

The other weapons I am conceiving all involve nanotechnology. I will explain more later.

fairy butler said...

I could use a nannite spy. Why am I here??? it is such a waste of time. all systems are off line.

Anonymous said...

Yez, yez, I see your dilemma. I am not sure that a deli-slicer is an appropriate weapon for the office, although I keep a mini one under my desk for emergencies. I've got an arsenal at home. I think guns are in order. Or maybe a radioactive xerox machine.

Anonymous said...

St. Elmo's Fire is playing on the radio right now.

fairy butler said...

kill them.

Mountain Man said...

FB the beige drains the luster, it is terrible!!! Can you bring a can of yellow paint to cover up the beige in your cube? Can you spill the skittles out and add some fun? I am sorry for the beige. Curses on it.

Anonymous said...

i heard someone playing a jefferson starship song. . .a sappy love ballad. It made me churlish. and hurlish.

Mountain Man said...

Many bats visited my head and tried to crush it in the night. FB, many hopes for less soiling and less fouling today. I am fashioning newfangled anti-chump guns for you. I am smithing them and filling them with bullets of disease.

Anonymous said...

FB. I will take a picture of the corner I look at and then you will not feel alone.

Solidarity in solitude!

fairy butler said...

thank you MM & Krix. I am accepting my corner-sitting fate. Trying to relish the good. The coffee here is better at least - and still free. Yay to that.

fairy butler said...

Perhaps, but usually I have a theory about decorating and the cube - that if I do not decorate then I can pretend that I do not really work here. However, I may have to reconsider this. My neighbor Daiel & I were thinking we could line the wall separating our cubes with dilbert plushies and those stainless bouncing ball sculptures, maybe a lava lamp and a stuffed animal. Make it real nice.

I may have to decorate, sadly, as this cube corner is very very depressing.

fairy butler said...

I would like to have small egyptian pyramid and sphinx on my desk, actually. Or the Gollum/Smeagal gargoyle like bookends I saw in the in-flight catalog.

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