Thursday, February 24, 2005

Pile Update

The piles have been busy. They have spawned. In addition to yesterday's piles this morning there were these types of piles:

1. oven
2. large mirror pieces stacked
3. white plastic chair
4. small cardboard dresser with beige flowers
5. the ironing board moved several hundred feet to park entrance
6. deli bag crammed with unmentionables - baby parts? diapers? feces?
7. smeared pit bull diarrhea turds everywhere

Stolen tire car is now missing taillights also. Spotted vacuum-packed hypodermic needle on subway stairs. This is making me depressed. Where is my cafe? I am going to become invisible for a little while now.


Henchman said...

I have to say that I ignore most piles and am now ashamed. I am too busy looking for invisible demons. But now I want to see the piles like you do. They sound sad.

Art Star said...

If you were some kind of derivative hack artist you could collect the piles and install them in a gallery. Or take large glossy photos of them. It would be so profound. The piles are grody.

mountain man said...

I love your blog FB. It makes me sad and hopeful at the same time.

fairy butler said...

Honestly, art star, I was thinking I should start taking digital pictures of the piles. Just to share. Maybe tomorrow I'll ask them if it's ok. They're shifty though.

worried said...

how do you know they are pit bull turds?

i would like to see those pile pictures. i bet you and your butler would take pictures that wouldn't be like pretentious art fag pictures. you have respect for the streets.

fairy butler said...

It doesn't take fairy magic to detect the work of a large dog, but I am not 100% they are not human or goat. I will work on this picture taking. My fairy butler doesn't like to get too close to the piles though.

Many many thanks for your kind words mountain man. I hope it does not make anyone too sad!!

Lion King! Are you sick? Why no posts? I miss your naughty nature.

lion king said...

grrr fairy butler.

I was making some piles of my own. Here are their contents:
1.poo with bile
2. chain link rope with empty spray paint cans

That is all. Not bad for one day. I intend to make more piles tom.
Fb, are you a sissy?

jessica said...

Here is what I saw on my way to work.

-Crosby stills, Nash and Young? (didn't look closely) broken record on top of white garbage bag filled with unknown substance.

fairy butler said...

CSN&Y is a good spot, Jessica. We all need to keep better tabs on these piles! They are so shifty. Make sure you do not kick that bag with the unknown contents... there might be a small folk-singing family in there. For real! (See earlier post about the Peruvians.)

Lion King, my magic is fading today. My butler is mad at me. I am a sissy. You are right. If you are making piles.. make sure not to eat them even though it is in your nature. Were you tempted? I bet your were. I think you need a new scratching post.

Pile hater said...

The snow!

The blessing!

The curse!

At first you may praise the snow for it's blanketing. A negating power on piles is always to be praised. At first. For the piles always win. With their crudaceous nature hidden, unseemly acts of propagation go unnoticed. Seeds of future disgust are sown. Don't be fooled by the 'power' of the fluffy whiteness from the sky. Piles always win.